June 2011, Klaipėda

After that travel I was full of new impressions, ideas and insights about myself. I like Lithuania very much. And just hard to explain all what I feel in this country.

I decided that if ever I will like dogs. And will have a female one. I will call such a dog Kłajpeda. But just because this name just sounds perfect to call a dog this way. And I completely do not know where this impression comes from. People from Lithuania themselves seem to me very independent in their personalities. I feel in Lithaunia really proud of who I am of my origin. But Kłajpeda sounds a bit funny to me still.

The most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen was sitting on a bench of a bus station in Marijampolė when I was sitting in a bus during a travel to Moscow in August 2006. Another day we had a departure to travel for 7 days to Beijing by train from Moscow. Believe me, it was not the best day of my life. So I returned to this country a few times. And I have spent really some time in national archive in Vilnius. Where I found so many microfilms about my ancestors that once I saw this resource I could not believe. CPAHL, Vilnius, Lithuania archive. It has rooted me in the ground and some people looked at me a bit reluctant as I am in fact Polish and they do not have too many reserves of resources like trust to people of Polish nationality. But that feeling does not seem strange to me. I completely do not feel Polish and believe me that to spend in Poland most time of my life was not easy! And still never is. But I realized then that by my origin I am definitely one of them after my father. I mean more from Belarusian-Lithuania ethnos. I have a trace of the fact that about XVIII century they were Greek-Catholics. What isn’t Polish major religion. And never was. Unitarian Church was widespread where my ancestors came from.

Yesterday this means 24.10.2018 in Hradec Králové I was talking with relatively old woman. Once she realized but after 30 minutes of talk in Czech language that I am not Czech but Polish (this is my nationality and place of birth, I have a Polish passport also) she returned to one image that follows her in her imagination. She told me she watched movie Katyń about killing so many representatives of Polish intellectual elites by communists. And it moved me a bit and impressed that she could not get over a negative feeling about it and in whole discussion for about 45 minutes she recalled what happened in Katyń for more than 4 times! Czech woman. Imagine! Who remembers communists and of course hates them. In Czech Republic, in Poland, everywhere.

If there is a personal reason to respect NATO military alliance for me it is definitely Baltic Air Policing international mission.

I am sorry if it shocks anyone but I am in fact a mixture of Lithuanian, Belarusian, Czech, German, Dutch and Polish blood. I am sorry if I hurt someone I doubt if too much Russian… Maybe a bit of Tatar (grandmother of my father was Tatar), the ethnic group that came through territory of Russia and many of them are Russian citizens. And if it makes anyone uncomfortable that needs to shorten me of some parts of my identity. I want to say just „fuck off”. I know who I am. I have spent some time of my life to fully realize who I am.

Night in Suwałki I think.


Definitely my ex.

They look a bit like from a cult group…